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The Time My Father Lost a Million Dollars and Went Bankrupt

April 19, 2017 By Patti Cotton Leave a Comment

The Time My Father Lost a Million Dollars and Went Bankrupt

Your future can hinge on just one critical conversation.

The problem is that many of us don’t like critical conversations.

These often deal with tough issues, and most of us prefer to avoid confronting these, hoping whatever needs to be dealt with will just go away.

It doesn’t.

There was a time, in the 1990s, when my father could have salvaged $1 million and saved his business. Instead, he was forced to sell and declare bankruptcy in the process.

It is a rich case study that bears in-depth analysis and conversation. But for the sake of this topic, let’s focus on the breaking point.

My father’s controller walked in one morning, looking as though she had just suffered a death.

“I have to tell you something,” she said. “It’s not going to be easy to hear.”

My father looked up and said, “Janet, we’ve always been able to talk about the tough stuff. You and I have been together in this endeavor for 30 years. What’s happening?”

“We’ve lost a million dollars,” Janet replied.

“We’ve…what?!”  my father gasped.

“We’ve lost a million dollars,” she repeated.

“That’s not possible,” Dad croaked. “Where is it on the books?”

“It’s not on the books,” Janet answered. “The books say we are fine. But it’s not in the bank…”

As the story unfolded, my father watched his business future melt away before his eyes. The billing manager for Medicaid had been stuffing paperwork in her desk drawer, rather than filing for reimbursement. For a year. Over $1 million was lost on the paperwork sitting in her desk drawer.

I’m not going to pretend to know why. There’s so much in this story for analysis that we could hold a week-long seminar on it. Who’s minding the store, protocols and process, checks and balances, accountability…so much…

But the pièce-de-résistance was that Dad’s controller had known about it for some time. She was just afraid to tell him.

The window of opportunity to send in the paperwork for reimbursement had passed. (There was a one-year limit on filing.) The controller knew long before the year was up that this was a problem.

But she had been too afraid to admit to Dad that she had not overseen the billing properly. That she had discovered this months into the process. That when she discovered the problem, she was unable to rectify it by holding the billing manager and the process accountable.

So she figuratively put her head in the sand.

Again, the story is much too long, full, and rich to share here. But my father was faced with having to sell the business because of the loss. And in the process, the buyer forced his hand by requesting that he file bankruptcy or lose the sale.

Dad bankrupted. Against every fiber of his being. Morally speaking, he didn’t agree with not paying his debt (and by the way, bless his soul, over the last 20 years, he has paid back every creditor personally from his own fixed income.)

But he lost a fortune and a future.

Outrageous? Unheard of? Not really. You’d be surprised at the losses in the business world due to just one critical conversation.

What critical conversation are you avoiding?


Patti Cotton helps executives optimize their effectiveness in leading self, others, and the enterprise. Her areas of focus include confidence, leadership style, executive presence, effective communication, succession planning, and masterful execution. With over 25 years of leadership experience, both stateside and abroad, Patti works with individuals, teams, and organizations across industries, providing executive coaching, leadership development, succession planning, change, and conflict management. She is also a Fortune 500 speaker. For more information on how Patti Cotton can help you and your organization, click here.

Patti Cotton

Patti Cotton reenergizes talented leaders and their teams to achieve fulfillment and extraordinary results. For more information on how Patti Cotton can help you and your organization, click here.

3 Things a Leader in a New Role Needs to Know

March 15, 2017 By Patti Cotton Leave a Comment

3 Things a Leader in a New Role Needs to Know

Congratulations!  You did it. You got the position, the title, and the salary telling you that you have arrived.

They gave you the team and the commission to change the world.

But did they tell you that you aren’t really in control?

That your hard-earned expertise is now for naught?

What do you do, now?

If you’ve done your research, you will have put together a game plan, and you are working on your “first 100 days” in office. You will be gathering and triaging information, building your new tribe, identifying short-term wins and long-term wins – the whole enchilada.

And this is absolutely necessary for so many reasons – you’ll be closely watched by those who chose you for the job. The two times they look most closely are during the first three months of your tenure, and at the end of your first year. A lot of judgment is going on. For you, these days are also critical – you need to quickly build trust with your team, identify and forge your operational network, and above all, avoid political landmines…

But – here are three things that you may not hear, and that you need to know right now:

1. What got you here won’t get you there.

You have been recognized for your success to this point. You were in charge of a certain area of responsibility, and that landscape has now changed. By extension, it’s important to know that your present knowledge base may no longer be useful – that the reasons for which they promoted you are not necessarily the reasons that will help you succeed, now. Your operational network – the network that helps you to get the job done – will now change. And even if you are highly skilled at spinning multiple plates, you will now need to develop the ability to manage the new, different pieces that this promotion brings. In short: ask yourself what the new pieces are – which are “need to manage,” “nice to manage,” and simply “nice to know.”  Keep it streamlined.

2. You aren’t in control – but you are in charge and therefore accountable.

It’s a changing world, and therefore a lot of external factors exist that you cannot control, both in the marketplace, and inside your company. Strategies and tactics will come and go as the company attempts to keep up and remain viable. To be successful so that you do your part to help the enterprise remain profitable and sustainable, you will need to re-examine your own beliefs and how you manage your environment. Why? Because at the end of the day, you can blame the externals for failure, but you are still accountable for what you did to help your area succeed. In short: don’t make any assumptions. Ask questions, stay abreast of trends and what is required to meet this – and ask yourself how this affects you, your team, and the company.

3. Your best game is only as accountable as your weakest link.

Get to know your team, its strategies and ways of operating, and be candid in asking them what has worked in the past, what has not worked, what could be better. Ask them where the team as a whole hesitates – what team behavior holds them back from their best envisioned performance. Ask them what tools and support they need to do their best work. Many team action plans are stuffed away in drawers, unused, because of counterproductive behaviors that keep these from reaching set goals. And many of these counterproductive behaviors are due to not having the resources and tools to do their best job. In short: find out what they feel they need to excel.

Here’s to a successful next professional chapter for you!


Patti Cotton helps executives optimize their effectiveness in leading self, others, and enterprises. Her areas of focus include confidence, leadership style, executive presence, effective communication, and masterful execution. With over 25 years of leadership experience, both stateside and abroad, Patti works with individuals, teams, and organizations across industries, providing executive coaching, leadership development, change, and conflict management. She is also a Fortune 500 speaker. For more information on how Patti Cotton can help you and your organization, click here.

Patti Cotton

Patti Cotton reenergizes talented leaders and their teams to achieve fulfillment and extraordinary results. For more information on how Patti Cotton can help you and your organization, click here.

When Your Team Member is Stuck in Story:

March 8, 2017 By Patti Cotton Leave a Comment

When Your Team Member is Stuck in Story

Helping Them Take Back Control

Do you love stories? So do I!

Stories are entertaining – and they help us make meaning of our world.

Some of my favorite stories are of the Sherlock Holmes type, where solving the mystery to bring solution is key.

But some tales are frustrating, like the kind in which your employee seems stuck. This kind affects everyone on the team. It slows down productivity… energy… motivation…

Is one of your team members holding you hostage to the same script? If you hear any of the following lines on a regular basis, you need to help your team member turn the page:

  • I can’t because…

  • It will have to wait until…

  • That would be nice, but…

  • I would have/could have, but…

I am often called to coach teams, and once coached a small, but key team to help them perform at a higher level. The talents were there. The desire was there. But the numbers were down. And the energy was low.

At one point early on, I asked them to walk me through a current project to see how they would describe the process of working together. And we hit the jackpot.

Terry, Laurie, and Martin began laying out the pieces of the project, and shared who was responsible for which part of the whole. Then I asked them to draft a timeline to show me how this would happen, and at what pace. At a certain point in the process, Laurie revealed that she was “stuck in story” – that she was unable to work around a chronic issue to move at a more acceptable pace.

“I can’t meet that deadline, Terry, and you know it. It will have to wait until I complete my part of the Blue project we are currently working on.”

“Oh– you still have that piece to complete?” asked Terry.

Martin joined in. “Can’t we figure out a different way to pace these things?”

“It’s not that – it’s just all the interruptions I get during the day. I can’t just tell people to go away.”

At this point, I interrupted.

“Are you saying that the interruptions are what is holding you back from being able to complete your work in a more timely fashion?”

“Yes,” Laurie answered. “The guys here know that my office is the first on the hallway, and that I’m seen as point person for the team. That means people coming in and out all day.”

I turned to Terry and Martin. “How does this slow down what you are able to complete?”

“Are you kidding?” said Martin. “We are constantly telling leadership they will have to wait because of this.”

“Okay,” I answered. “So what’s the solution to this?”

“You mean to the interruptions?” asked Laurie. “There is none. Like I said, my office is first, we are asked to be responsive, and if it isn’t office visits, it’s e-mails and phone calls. All day. I could be much faster – but I can’t because of this.”

Laurie was stuck in her story – the story that she had to operate in a certain way because of her role, even though it held her work back – which held back the entire team.

It was time to rewrite her story.

“Laurie, let’s brainstorm,” I said. “We need Terry and Martin’s help, here. If you weren’t there in that office to field interruptions, what would happen?”

“Good grief, if they couldn’t find me, they’d barrage me with e-mails and phone calls on my cell.”

“Your cell?”  I asked. “Colleagues here call you on your cell for work questions?”

“Well, yes – if they can’t find me. They know they can chase me down on my cell. And then, the e-mails keep coming.”

“Laurie, what would happen if you turned off your cell and scheduled time twice daily to look at your e-mails?”

Terry sat up. “I said that months ago!” he said. “Why does the entire work floor have to hold you hostage, Laurie?”

“Hostage?” responded Laurie. “That sounds like I’m a prisoner.”

“Well,” I said, “The way you describe things, you have pretty much said so. I mean, you’ve said you cannot control it. But…”

“But, what?” she said.

“But – you can control yourself and what you choose to do with the barrage coming your way.”

“But if I do that, I’ll have piles of e-mails and calls to return – and that will put me farther behind.”

“Laurie, it sounds like people are depending on you to drop everything and help at any time,” I countered.

“Hey,” said Martin, “Patti’s right. Actually, you have a bunch of people who look to you to help them out all the time when it’s actually not your job or place.”

“Well…” Laurie got still. “I guess it’s true.”

“What are you getting out of fielding these cries for help all day long, Laurie?” I asked.

She got quiet.

“Laurie,” I moved forward gently, “Are you getting some satisfaction out of helping?”

“Well, yes,” she said. “And if I am honest with myself, I guess that most of it isn’t even related to our department. I know I said I was point person – but it’s much more than that. In truth, maybe it’s just a way to feel valuable.”

“Valuable?” asked Terry. “You think you aren’t valuable to our team?”

And then, our real work began. And although we had to do some deep work, it paid off.

I’m happy to report that a few months later, the team members were working at top performance, with all members understanding and appreciating each other’s value.

Don’t you love a story with happy ending? I certainly do!


Patti Cotton helps women executives optimize their effectiveness in leading self, others, and enterprises. Her areas of focus include confidence, leadership style, executive presence, effective communication, and masterful execution. With over 25 years of leadership experience, both stateside and abroad, Patti works with individuals, teams, and organizations across industries, providing executive coaching, women’s leadership development, change, and conflict management. She is also a Fortune 500 speaker. For more information on how Patti Cotton can help you and your organization, click here.

Patti Cotton

Patti Cotton reenergizes talented leaders and their teams to achieve fulfillment and extraordinary results. For more information on how Patti Cotton can help you and your organization, click here.

Pushing Beyond Success

March 1, 2017 By Patti Cotton Leave a Comment

I worked with an impressive executive last year, whom I will call Jerry (not his real name). Jerry managed an area of responsibility generating more than $20 million in annual revenues, and top leadership was considering him to succeed the COO in future.

He reached out to me for help because he really wanted that position. “I’m ready for a new challenge,” he said. “I get bored easily when success becomes routine. Taking on the role of COO has been in my sights for some time.”

If the reader is thinking, “Boy, what an ego,” there may be an element of that. However, most people who desire to lead love to be challenged, and routine anything can quickly demotivate.

So Jerry had set his sights on this promotion.

There was just one problem. Jerry wasn’t ready.

Jerry was leaving money on the table within his current responsibility, and he’d known it for a while. The company should have noticed, too, as they considered him in future planning.

You see, Jerry’s current team had worked with him for almost 10 years, and they knew how to work with him to get things done. And they’d always hit their mark of $20 million. Always. But the needle hadn’t moved for 10 years.

How could Jerry be effective in a larger role if he didn’t know how to maximize the current potential in front of him?

When Jerry and I sat down, he shared his revenue projections and showed the potential in additional market share. He shared his team’s roles and responsibilities and current strategies. He said they were all super people who knew how to do their jobs very well. But he didn’t know how to break through the $20 million mark.

How could he get his team to perform at even higher levels?

So I asked if I could sit in on one of his team meetings as they examined the gap and the potential.

After the meeting, Jerry and I sat down. “I believe I’ve identified a key problem,” I said. “And it’s not your team. Jerry. Before we look at your team’s performance, we need to talk about widening your personal perspective. We need to talk about some deep listening.”

“Deep listening?” he reared back. “Isn’t that for coaches and therapists?”

“Jerry, you have helped this company realize great success through what you have done with this team. But the money you are leaving on the table is not the team’s fault. Here’s what I heard in your meeting:  three ideas from your team members that you discounted immediately. You told them why it wouldn’t work. I’m frankly surprised they are still coming up with ideas for you when you ask!  And here’s what I didn’t hear – ‘I’m listening – tell me more. How might that work?’ You simply aren’t allowing your team to participate.”

Jerry paused. “You mean I’m responsible for keeping this team stuck? I’m personally responsible for not generating more revenue?”

I nodded. “The strategies you have taken have gotten you this far – but they aren’t taking you any farther. You have an amazing team!  But you aren’t allowing them to contribute. You aren’t tapping into your team’s perspectives and considering their ideas – new ideas that may likely take you far. You have a choice, here – either continue to do the same thing and get the same results, or allow your team in.”

Of course, this first conversation was just a door-opener. Working with Jerry to widen his perspective, to help him peel off of black-and-white thinking, took longer, because old habits die hard. And we did look at team performance together, as we worked on developing his ability to listen and consider new points of view.

But in the end, it did pay off. After working with Jerry and his team for just 6 months, they began to capture additional market share and increase their revenues.

“It’s funny,” Jerry said later on. “I have a much greater rapport with my team. We enjoy each other more. Work has become fun instead of tense, even though we are performing at higher levels. I guess allowing others in to contribute really pays off.”

I love that deep listening.


Patti Cotton helps women executives optimize their effectiveness in leading self, others, and enterprises. Her areas of focus include confidence, leadership style, executive presence, effective communication, and masterful execution. With over 25 years of leadership experience, both stateside and abroad, Patti works with individuals, teams, and organizations across industries, providing executive coaching, women’s leadership development, change, and conflict management. She is also a Fortune 500 speaker. For more information on how Patti Cotton can help you and your organization, click here.

Patti Cotton

Patti Cotton reenergizes talented leaders and their teams to achieve fulfillment and extraordinary results. For more information on how Patti Cotton can help you and your organization, click here.

Are You Tired of Visioning?

February 15, 2017 By Patti Cotton Leave a Comment

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The Importance of Short-Term Wins

Sometimes I get tired about visioning the future and setting long-range goals. These are certainly important – but they aren’t enough to keep me on track.

How about you?

Short-term wins and intermediate goals are the fuel for getting there. And you can leverage this with your team to keep them motivated and inspired.

Years ago, I sat with a CEO and talked about how to keep his healthcare system viable and vibrant.

“I’m tired, Patti,” he said. “Look at this,” and he pulled out a heavy drawer full of notebooks. “These are all strategic plans. Through the years, we’ve hired expensive consultants to come and walk through the process with us and all we have to show for it is…paper.”  He sighed. “The more I look at these, the more tired I get. The future seems so far off – and we aren’t moving forward. What good is a strategic plan, anyway?”

He shut the drawer. “I’m beginning to believe we’ll never get there. We’ve set up 3-year action plans, designated responsibilities – but, somehow, we all get too busy doing the day-to-day stuff that this place requires.”

This guy looked pretty tired. Bone tired. Discouraged.

“What about your short-term plan?” I asked.

“Short-term plan?”

“Yes, a plan that sets key milestones and success indicators in 3-4 month increments.”

He paused. “Why would I do that? I know very well what to do to get there.”

“Well,” I responded. “How’s that working for you and your executive team?”

It’s not just a matter of knowing how to get there – if you don’t have a plan that has intermediate goals and milestones, you not only lack measurements to show you how well you are headed there, but you also miss out on a key secret to staying motivated – and keeping your team motivated, as well.

And when motivation is gone, nothing happens.

So how do you set these?

Take your one-year plan and reverse-engineer it – what are the major projects and steps to get there? What should you be seeing if you are on course by the end of Q1, Q2, Q3, and Q4? In other words, how will you know you are on the path to success?

When you are able to make these indicators tangible so that you can see you are hitting the mark, then you are on your way to sustaining momentum and energy. And you need that. Not only you, but your team needs it. It helps them to know that they are doing well, on the right track, and meeting motivation.

No small potatoes. Because keeping a team motivated when you have huge goals can be challenging.

So here’s my challenge to you:  get with your team and look at your one-year plan. Break it up, assigning major projects, deadlines, the people responsible, and key indicators that show these projects are successfully meeting the goals of the one-year plan. This is a great team-building exercise, and you will have set in place the motivators that will keep you and your team on track.


Patti Cotton helps women executives optimize their effectiveness in leading self, others, and enterprises. Her areas of focus include confidence, leadership style, executive presence, effective communication, and masterful execution. With over 25 years of leadership experience, both stateside and abroad, Patti works with individuals, teams, and organizations across industries, providing executive coaching, women’s leadership development, change, and conflict management. She is also a Fortune 500 speaker. For more information on how Patti Cotton can help you and your organization, click here.

Patti Cotton

Patti Cotton reenergizes talented leaders and their teams to achieve fulfillment and extraordinary results. For more information on how Patti Cotton can help you and your organization, click here.

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