Patti Cotton

Executive Coach & Career Strategist

men in the workplace

Focus Bandits – Have You Been Robbed?

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Focus Bandits – Have You Been Robbed?
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Are you easily distracted, or are you finding it hard to concentrate?

Worried this will affect contributing your best work?

Before you get swept away in a sea of overwhelm, see if these three focus bandits are lurking in your vicinity.

If so, I’ve given some tips for you to eliminate the thieves and recapture clarity and focus so you can get going!

1. Unfinished business.

You may be carrying a stress load from unresolved conflict.

Is there a current challenge outside of the immediate work at hand that you need to resolve? A critical conversation that needs to occur?

Even more insidious is a long-standing situation that has silently eroded your focus for some time. If you aren’t sure as to whether you have any of the latter in your life, do a short self-assessment.

Rate yourself from 1-10 in the following areas:

  • Personal finances
  • Friends and family
  • Intimate relationship
  • Career
  • Fun and recreation
  • Physical environment
  • Spiritual life

With 10 being ultimate success, give yourself a score in each area. If any are less than 10, ask yourself what holds you back from a 10. The problem will emerge, and then it’s up to you to decide how you will resolve it.

2. Too many good things.

The adage, “Because I can, I do,” is bunk.

When a client tells me he or she is overworked and highly stressed, it usually comes from one of three areas:

  • Mismanagement (lack of delegating appropriately, avoiding conflict to allow it to pile up and affect the team, or other poor management practices)
  • A need to please others by accepting new assignments or an increase in responsibility without the proper support
  • Delusions of grandeur (believing you can handle it all, when the calendar shows it is physically impossible)

Do any of these feel as though they might be the case for you?

The mind needs “white space” or downtime to reflect, process, and actually follow through with the work prescribed from all those meetings we attend.

If you aren’t finding that white space in your life, it is time to re-organize. Identify the non-essentials and delegate or eliminate. You can have it all – just not all at the same time!

 3. Lack of organization, prioritization.

I find this less in my corporate clientele than my entrepreneurs, only because it is tough to wear several hats at once when you are building a business. However, this can also creep up when you are a corporate executive, and it usually occurs when you have just been handed an additional area of responsibility.

If this is you, whether things have just piled up, or whether you have accepted new opportunities, you’ll do best with formulating a 90-day plan of action to help you…

  • Prioritize
  • Identify short- and long-term wins
  • Determine the internal and external connections you need to cultivate in order to best get the work done
  • Establish a process whereby you can stay focused on the top priorities

I’ve helped many clients turn things around with this approach, and besides getting organized, the plan has kept their focus to a level that builds great credibility with others quickly.

And finally (bonus tip), here is the unvarnished truth for you who are eternal optimists:

You are fooling yourself if you use phrases that sound like, “As soon as _______ happens, I will have more time to breathe easier, capture more white space….”

If you find yourself in any of the above descriptions, you can recapture a great deal of focus and lessen your stress by simply being tough enough to create better boundaries for yourself.

It’s not always easy – but the reward is oh, so great.

HOW MUCH

DO OTHERS REALLY TRUST YOU?

​Learn the two vital parts to trust and how they can help you become a more highly effective leader.

GET THE INFOGRAPHIC

Four Types of Leadership Behaviors You Can’t Do Without

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Four Types of Leadership Behaviors You Can’t Do Without
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How many leadership behaviors have you read about? Ten? Twenty? Another number?

Pretty mind-boggling, isn’t it? And if you are like many, such a sea of varying information can cause you to simply put the latest article aside and go back to doing things the way you know how.

In the world of leadership development, schools of thought are just as varied, and this means that I, as executive coach, can choose to use an assessment that evaluates 10 areas, or 26 areas.

So, now what?

If you are seeking to fast-track your leadership in this new year, I advise that you focus on enhancing just a small subset of four leadership behaviors.

Just four areas.

New research reveals that these four types of leadership behaviors account for 89% of leadership effectiveness, especially for front-line leaders. (Source: McKinsey’s Organizational Health Index https://www.mckinsey.com/)

McKinsey & Company surveyed 81 organizations, diverse in industry and geography (agriculture, consulting, energy, government, insurance, mining, and real estate in North America, Latin America, Asia, and Europe).

The results showed the following four areas of leadership to be most important, explaining 89% of the variance between strong and weak organizations in terms of leadership effectiveness.

  1. Supporting others.
  2. Solving problems effectively.
  3. Operating to follow through for results.
  4. Seeking different perspectives.

What does this mean for you?

Well, what it doesn’t mean is that you just need these four and then you can sit back and relax. But what it does mean is that, as you review your leadership commission and where to start, it may well be with these four.

Rating yourself on a scale of 1-5, how do you feel you measure up?

I’ve included some reflective questions to help you begin your assessment:

Supporting others.

Do you operate with authenticity, and show a sincere interest in those around you? Do you seek to inspire and build trust? Are you adopting the approach “tough on issues, tender on people”?

Solving problems effectively.

Are you thoughtful as you analyze and consider best options for action? Do you seek to be proactive in identifying and anticipating challenges, and to come up with solutions, rather than to react too quickly without the information you need, risking a poor decision?

Operating to follow through for results.

Do you marry vision and supporting strategy to action? Have you mastered the behaviors required to meet your goals and objectives, and can you manage people, products, and process effectively so that outcomes are a reflection of your best work?

Seeking different perspectives.

As esoteric as it sounds, do you “seek first to understand, then to be understood?” (Stephen Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Successful People). Do you ask your team members to contribute ideas for performance improvement? Are you keeping the pulse on changes in the environment that are likely to influence your company and your work?

Developing any one of these four is a game-changer, and I will tell you frankly that you probably won’t do this alone. Why? It is one thing to be self-aware about the changes one needs to make, and it’s quite another to be able to effectuate those shifts and make them part of who you truly are. You will need to tap into some kind of expert support to step into more of this potential.

This said, the first step to change is to identify the needed change. So, where will you start? What will give you the greatest ROI in your own leadership?

And secondly, who might help you get there?

Ten Character Indicators

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Ten Character Indicators
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“How you do one thing is how you do everything.” ~ Madeline Albright

Thirty years ago, a business owner named Dave found himself in a critical position. A key employee had been found embezzling, and the company faced a $1 Mil shortfall. To Dave’s business, this was the difference between surviving and sinking.

After examining his options, he felt the only thing he could do was to sell the business or find a partner who would invest money to help stabilize the company. As luck would have it, he found a man named Ed who owned quite a few businesses similar to his, and who was willing to become a partner with Dave to save the enterprise’s future.

One day, as they were finalizing terms of the partnership, Dave and Ed went to lunch.

During the meal, something happened that should have tipped Dave off about Ed’s character. But he ignored it. He was desperate for funds and reasoned that the incident had nothing to do with how Ed would conduct himself in business. And because he chose to ignore this incident, it wound up quietly hurting Dave for the next 30 years.

What was the tip-off to Ed’s character during that fateful lunch?

When it was time to settle the $48 food bill, Ed offered to pay. The server brought change from Ed’s two $20 bills and the men left for their cars. As Dan and Ed stepped into the parking lot, Ed chuckled as he folded his money into his wallet.

“That gal needs to pay more attention,” Ed said. “Instead of giving me $2 change, she gave me a $1 bill and one of my $20 bills.”

“Ed – that’s obviously a mistake on her part! You’re going to return it, right?” asked Dan.

“Are you kidding?” said Ed. “If someone is going to be that careless, it’s money for me and a good lesson for them.”

Dave felt terrible. He went home and wrote an apology letter to the restaurant. Without disclosing who the offender was, he enclosed a $20 bill as repayment.

The next week, Dave and Ed signed partnership papers. Ed contributed the agreed-upon cash infusion to the business and thus saved it. He brought in a managing administrator to manage the company as agreed. Over the next 30 years, Dave enjoyed residual income from the business without having to manage it, and Ed’s appointed administrator operated as per Ed’s directives.

One day, Ed fell terminally ill, and Dave was called in by a key executive to talk about the future of the company and the partnership interests. As Dave and the executive went over opportunities, it slowly came to light that the business was charging Dave a disproportionately higher amount for expenses in facilities, upkeep, and business development for 30 years. The amount of money that should come to him as profit was staggering. Dave felt physically sick. These funds could have made a great difference to him and his family over the 3 decades that had passed, but he was now a weary 87-year-old widower with little energy left to fight the battle.

It was then that he thought back to that first lunch with Ed and heard his words, “If someone is going to be that careless, it’s money for me and a good lesson for them.”

The fact is, character does matter. Madeline Albright’s quote “How you do one thing is how you do everything,” rings true.

Now, most of you reading here will quickly say that you would have given back the $20 on the spot. I am confident that you would have done so. But no matter how honest you are, might there be other areas in your personal conduct or ways of doing that need fine-tuning?

Character does matter.

Here is a list of 10 common character flaws that have significant repercussions in life and work.

  1. Are you punctual and thus respectful of others and your time together, or are you perpetually late, signaling to others that they are just “not that important”?
  2. Do you respect good boundaries with others, or do you tend to blur the lines to the point where you become entangled in problems that aren’t yours?
  3. Are you careful as you commit to others, or do you tend to overpromise and under-deliver or default?
  4. Do you seek always to understand first, or are you prone to snap judgments before you investigate fully?
  5. Are you respectfully honest when asked for feedback, or do you gloss over the truth as you seek to please others?
  6. Are you open to constructive criticism, or do you take a defensive stance as you find excuses for the behavior in question?
  7. Do you seek to reconcile or release undesirable stress in healthy ways, or do you tend to carry resentment around like a boulder, compromising your relationships (and your health)?
  8. Are you quick to support others when they are a topic of gossip, or do you jump on the injurious bandwagon with the crowd?
  9. Are you respectful of what’s yours and what is company property, or do you find yourself taking home a few pens or empty file folders for your own use, because you tell yourself “it really doesn’t matter.”
  10. Do you operate from a place of generosity, or do you race to get that proverbial front parking spot before the other person does?

Can you think of others? What is the one area that you would like to work on that will make a difference to your life and to those around you?

How to Look Back in Order to Move Forward

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How to Look Back in Order to Move Forward
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This is the time of year when many of us are already planning for 2018, while seeing how to best juggle the upcoming holiday season. There are messages and markers everywhere that prompt us to do both, as much as most of us would just like to concentrate on the month at hand.

Signs of December celebrations are everywhere. It seems that the marketplace has jumped over Thanksgiving to light up stores with holiday decorations. People are busy scheduling social events and already feeling the edge of overwhelm that a packed calendar can bring during this season.

At the same time, the workplace is confirming budgets for 2018, prompting a hard look at targeting new goals and strategies.

So, if you are like me, you are receiving e-mail messages and calls to prepare not only for social events, but for client work deadlines that actually have to do with a running start to 2018.

Strategic planning and setting personal or professional goals for 2018, while seeing how to best manage the last two months of the year can be tough. Defining how you want next year to look can turn out to be a quick two-question process that can leave out some important self-reflection.

Here is what I mean: most of us will tend to scramble, by asking ourselves, “What did I not accomplish this year that I need to accomplish next year? What do I need to do differently in order to achieve this desired state or goal next year?”

I call this line of questioning “war zone thinking.”

This is a quick tactical assessment which is useful in times of war for quick action to avoid disaster. However, it also places us in a state of “high stress alert,” impelling you to operate from the “fight or flight” area of the brain.

Operating in this way is highly counter-productive for visioning and planning strategically for next year’s goals and aspirations, and here are three reasons why:

  1. From a mindset point of view, such a quick line of questioning can tend to make you feel as though you are behind, and not performing or accomplishing enough.

Beginning a planning process with the question, “What did I not accomplish?” intimates that you have failed in some way, and places you in a defensive posture that does not allow for best processing.

  1. Using the “fight or flight” area of the brain will keep you in a state of stress and throw up roadblocks to using your “executive brain.”

The latter is the part of the brain that allows your creativity to spring forth, your visionary abilities to rise, and use of your best critical and analytical thinking skills.

  1. Assessing where you are, where you need to be, and how to get there should begin by providing a snapshot of wins and celebrations.

You will want to remind yourself as to what has worked well and what you used to achieve this so that you have a top-of-mind picture of the strengths you may use for moving forward.

The following framework is a positive and useful kick-off to your own personal planning, or your professional strategic planning process at the individual, team, and organizational levels.

Looking Back to Move Forward

  1. What accomplishments and milestones have I reached this year? The past 3-5 years?
  2. How would I like to celebrate these?
  3. What personal strengths and skills did I use in order to reach these achievements?
  4. What adversities and unexpected challenges have occurred during this time?
  5. How did I push through or move past these?
  6. How would I like to acknowledge myself for moving past these adverse occurrences?
  7. As I think about next year, what will be important to celebrate and the end of December?
  8. What are the top 1-3 goals I want target to achieve?
  9. To what will I say “no” in order to say “yes” to these? What critical shifts and conversations will need to take place?
  10. What personal strengths and skills will I use to make these things happen?

Once you have thoughtfully reflected on or discussed the answers to these questions, you will be in a positive and energetic frame of mind to move through your strategic planning process for 2018.

How to Instantly Influence Others and Make a Difference

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How to Instantly Influence Others and Make a Difference
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“Be the change you want to see in the world.” ~ Gandhi

Recently, I worked with a group of new managers to help them make change at their company. Eager to learn and grow, people of all ages and backgrounds filled the room.

It was heartwarming to be with them and witness lot of candor, laughter, and strengthening bonds as they shared. These people were committed.

Here is one thing I never heard: a disparaging remark. I didn’t hear about a lack of resources or time. I never heard things like, “Oh, those Millennials/Boomers/Leadership/Others – I don’t know how to work with them.”

What I heard, instead, was a desire to make change. “How can I be at my very best? How can I grow in my leadership so I can make a bigger difference?”

Now, that’s a room full of people that anyone would be privileged to work with!

Here are the three questions I asked them in return. I shared that the answers to these questions are what would make or break their ability to influence and make a difference.

How are you doing in these three areas?

  1. Are you walking your talk?

Are there places in your leadership where you are preaching, but not practicing?

Maybe you are asking others to go the extra mile, produce more without overtime pay, take better care of themselves, produce top quality work on time – fill in the blank!

But you yourself secretly lack being able to meet success in that area. This is not uncommon – the very thing we want to see in ourselves is what we ask others to do well. If this is you, you are responsible for course-correcting this so that you are the change you want to see.

  1. Are you modeling to others by taking the first step?

Are you great at delegating work to others, but not as good at jumping in to roll up your own sleeves in times of stress?

I remember delegating very well during a huge event, and walking around at a tense moment to see how things were progressing. I looked across the room to see the company president unloading boxes with one of my reports. That was a humbling moment that shifted my understanding of true leadership.

  1. Are you taking ownership of how you contribute?

When was the last time you sat down with a colleague or report and asked the question, “How am I doing?”

This should be a regular conversation. “What can I do more of or less of, in order to do a better job of working with you?”

My clients report that this conversation has brought forward valuable information they might never have uncovered otherwise. “It has shifted the way I am able to work with others,” said one business owner. “We are a team now – not just a group of people in a room.” That’s a change!

As you look at these three areas, which one speaks most to you? What is the one shift you are committing to make so that you can influence others to a larger extent and make a greater difference?