Why Aren’t You Leading? Part II

Mastering Your Inner Leader, Part II

Last week, I asked you why you aren’t leading.

And a lot of you have written in to tell me why.

• A few of you cited you needed more confidence – most of you stated you were ready to do the work, but you weren’t quite sure where to start.
• Not surprisingly, every single one of you admitted that you were capable of more.
• You also mentioned being at a place in your life where you are ready to lead – to take charge, and to accept greater responsibility for more recognition and reward.

Last week, we talked about the vital step of mastering your inner leader before you can “take it outside” to effectively engage and execute as one. Most people make the mistake of thinking they can develop their leadership simply by attending a company’ program designed for this, or by reading the best books on the subject and putting learning to practice. How hard can it be, after all? But these efforts fail.

There are a few reasons why this doesn’t work, even though the United States spends more than $170 Billion annually on training. And we explored this last week.

But it came down to this:  You must empower your leadership from the inside out!

In other words, you must identify and know how to effectively use the unique abilities you possess within to govern your decisions, behaviors, and actions. And we started with values – key to success. You can read more about it here in Part I.

This week, I want to discuss the next important step in mastering your inner leader…identifying into your life themes to discover your purpose, or your “why.”

Why is this important? It’s how you do your job – and why.

Keeping your purpose central to all you do keeps the passion flowing in your leadership. It’s the heart-to-action connection. It also makes your leadership distinctive – something that helps you to stand out and rise above the crowd.

A while ago, I sat with a woman named Jane.

“Patti,” she said, “I doubt you can help. My motivation left me about a year ago. I’ve lost touch with colleagues and team. Goals aren’t exciting. I wish I was retired – yesterday.”

“You are checking out – I can hear that,” I answered. “What happened?”

“You tell me. That’s why you are here,” she smiled.

So I asked Jane why she did what she did. What fired her up to get going in the morning? What difference was she making in her leadership, and in the outcomes she produced for the company? And she couldn’t tell me.

“You’ve lost your reason for leading,” I said. “It’s your purpose. We sometimes call it ‘your why.’”

“So,” she asked, “How did that happen?”

“Oh, it happens when we don’t stay true to our life themes, our purpose. Purpose is what drives us. It fuels meaning and satisfaction.”

“Can I get it back?”

“Yes, you can,” I smiled.

I worked with Jane on identifying the main themes throughout her life that had driven her decisions and actions. Two things stood out for us:  Jane had always sought to be an advocate and a teacher – even when small. It showed up on the playground, in her volunteer work in college, and throughout her career. We could look back and see how she had used it to rise to be the executive she was, today.

But about a year ago, Jane had been assigned an ailing initiative requiring her full attention. And we noticed that when she did so, she began to lose the passion in her work. A closer examination revealed that Jane had not actively considered how to use her advocate and teacher themes in approaching the initiative. Instead, she had taken quite a different approach that was creating burnout as it depleted her energy. As she lost her edge, she began to disconnect from others in small ways. Over a year’s time, she wound up feeling isolated and alone.

Fortunately, we were able to turn this around, reconnecting with her life themes of advocate and teacher, and shifting her approach to incorporate these into her work. I’m happy to report that after reconnecting with her purpose, she is back in top form, and loving her work, once again. Others recognize it – and she is being considered for a greater role.

What are your life themes? Can you look back over the years to see what roles you have naturally sought to play, and what energizes you as you do so?

Here’s are some quick questions to get you started in identifying your why:

1. Describe 3 experiences in your life when you faced challenges. How have they shaped you?
2. Look back at a period in your life when you felt special, as though you were meant for “this.” What were you doing? What was the role you played, and what energized you?
3. For what reasons do people seek your help? Among those, which ones energize you?

 

Meanwhile, please join me in our LinkedIn group for more discussion on this topic.

How do you integrate your values in your work?