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Patti Cotton

Executive Coach & Career Strategist

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Three Tips to Boost a Culture of Inclusivity

May 8, 2019 By Patti Cotton Leave a Comment

Three Tips to Boost a Culture of Inclusivity
Image Credit: Shutterstock

An open and honest environment is important for a healthy company culture.

Fostering this is important to employee engagement and your ability to retain top talent.

But if your employees don’t feel free to express their opinions, you are keeping them from feeling more motivated to contributing their best work.

Why is this the case? And how can you turn this around?

Studies show that creating a sense of belonging in the workplace is one of the top criteria for an employee to feel engaged. A sense of belonging allows employees to feel like they are able to be authentic. And the ability to feel authentic at work affects an employee’s sense of contribution, which in turn, affects their engagement and performance.

Most CEOs pride themselves on creating such a sense of belonging. They cite great on-boarding processes, recognition programs, and intentional cultural markers and norms such as “Dress Down Friday” and the annual employee picnic.

But there is one area affecting employee retention that gets overlooked quite a bit. And this is making sure that you teach your people how to value differing perspectives or opinions.

As your employees come from all walks of life, backgrounds, beliefs, and experiences, they are bound to have various perspectives and opinions. And nothing will curb a feeling of inclusion faster than to discount someone’s opinion.

I’ve heard things in executive meeting brainstorming sessions such as, “Well, John, that can’t work because…” or, “That approach is impossible,” as first responses to someone offering ideas for solutions.

What happens?

Shutdown.

People hesitate to speak up. They are afraid of “getting it wrong,” or of being discounted.

And nothing is worse than sending that kind of message if you are trying to create a spirit of inclusion.

Everyone wants to feel included. Having that sense of acceptance and belonging is key to fueling the desire to contribute and be a part of something.

Here are three tips that will help you boost your culture’s spirit of inclusivity.

  1. Make sure you have a growth mindset.

Do you find your executive team is in a rut when it comes to new ideas? Make sure it hasn’t calcified to a fixed stance of “This is the way we have always done it.” You may not readily hear it, but you will see it in the way that your executives become complacent and comfortable with “what is.”

If this is the case, begin having brainstorm sessions around new ideas by asking the question, “What is possible, here? If we couldn’t do it the way we have always done it, how might we approach this?”

  1. The first responder to someone else’s opinion must be a cheerleader.

Develop the “carrot approach” to encourage people contributing their ideas and perspectives. Adopt the group norm that when a person comes up with an idea, the first one to respond must offer something positive.

He or she doesn’t have to agree with the opinion, but should at least laud the other person for thinking outside of the box. This kind of immediate response will develop a culture of acceptance and inclusion. No idea is a bad one – let’s consider it.

  1. Ask questions instead of making pronouncements.

When exploring the opinions and perspectives of others, take an open-minded approach by asking questions to dive deeper. “Tell me more,” or “Let’s talk about how that might work.” This keeps you on your toes to consider new possibilities, and at the same time, creates a spirit of togetherness as you work through toward a solution.

The next time you are tempted to share why a particular idea won’t work, pause and redirect. You’ll find that your team will become more engaged, animated, and willing to contribute at much higher levels.

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© Patti Cotton and patticotton.com. All rights reserved. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express written permission from the author is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that attribution is made to Patti Cotton and patticotton.com, with links thereto.

Patti Cotton

Patti Cotton reenergizes talented leaders and their teams to achieve fulfillment and extraordinary results. For more information on how Patti Cotton can help you and your organization, click here.

3 Essential Shifts Every Leader Must Make

October 31, 2018 By Patti Cotton Leave a Comment

3 Essential Shifts Every Leader Must Make
Image Credit: Shutterstock

Are you prepared to lead into the future?

Most leaders are not.

The world is increasing in complexity, and you as a leader must grow to support change effectively. The problem is that most in leadership have reached the top and stopped growing. They have given in to the false premise that, because they have the ability to meet today’s demands, they can certainly meet what the future brings.

Are you a leader who has reached the top – and stopped?

You may think you have what it takes. However, there are three shifts that, unless you make them, will quickly render you ineffective in the future.

What are these? And why should you pay attention when things are fine the way they are right now?

This week, we’ll talk about the first shift – why you need to make it and first steps to take.

Shift I: Relational Abilities Must Increase

Relational skills are now taking a front seat to all other leadership competencies. Your ability to relate well to others may work well today, but tomorrow’s leadership will need to call on more and to sharpen their emotional intelligence (“EQ”) on a consistent basis.

Why?

Emotional intelligence (“EQ”) is what helps you have high relational skills, and these are paramount to effective leadership.

Here are just some of the ways that EQ facilitates this:

  • EQ allows you to understand how your emotions and actions affect the people around you. This is necessary to regulating the way you interact with others so that you can create bonds and team.
  • EQ provides you with the ability to put yourself in the shoes of others, to understand how they feel, and to consider their perspectives. This ability to empathize can draw people to you and influence them. It can serve to power negotiations in tense times, and to promote compassion, which is a necessary component to embodying powerful servant leadership.
  • EQ promotes good communication. If you have forged bonds and trust with others, you tend to communicate better and more often, avoiding conflict and misunderstandings that poor communication fosters.
  • EQ provides you with the ability to mentor others and shape a healthy culture. Your ability to model high relational skills will serve as the prototype for your entire organization.

And in a world where constant change has become the norm, your ability to relate well to others is what will instill confidence in you and commitment to you on the part of those around you.

The problem is that we relate to others as we have been taught. This means that we bring with us a host of older experiences that color how well we are able to show up with and relate to others. Sharpening your EQ so that you up-level your ability to relate is more important than ever.

Are you already a pro in relating? Is your EQ high? You still need to make the shift to lead successfully into the future.

Here’s why: Emotional intelligence needs consistent exercise to remain effective. Your EQ is a “muscle” that needs flexing on a regular basis, or you will lose it. What’s more, just like working out at the gym, you can’t focus only on bicep curls and expect that the rest of your body will become fit by osmosis.

Use it – or lose it.

In fact, if you neglect your EQ for an extended period, you place yourself in danger of developing what we call Hubris Syndrome. If this is the case, you are now in imminent danger of losing your leadership position and perhaps your company.

How do you avoid this?

Here are 5 steps to systematically strengthen your EQ to support your relational skills.

1. Tap back into your own emotions. For example, how do you typically respond when someone delivers bad news to you? Criticizes you unfairly? Cuts you off on the freeway? By recognizing your emotions, you will be better able to regulate and control them so that you manage your relationships and interactions with others better. Tapping back into your emotions also allows you to recognize these emotions in others and to empathize with them. When you exhibit empathy, you build rapport, as others feel you care.

2. Ask others for their perspective. Leaders develop tunnel-vision when it comes to decision-making. After all, putting out fires all day long, dealing with the unexpected and the myriad of pieces that make up the organization requires fast thinking and acting. However, 60% of all decisions that leaders make are wrong, and this is primarily due to “either-or” problem-solving. “Either we do this, or we do that.” Asking others for their perspective on various issues that arise can give you added insight to expand your options. At the same time you widen your perspective-taking, you also allow others to feel they can contribute to the larger picture. And that’s a great relational skill.

3. Be curious instead of quick to judge. You think you can put yourself in someone else’s shoes, but can you really know how they feel? We bring our own experiences to the mix, and it is wise to ask questions rather than assume that you understand how they feel or what they want. Replace phrases such as, “I know just how you feel…” with ones like, “This feels devastating to me, but tell me how this affects you. I want to understand…”

4. Develop deep listening skills. There is perhaps no greater gift than that of being heard. Exercising deep listening skills is to hear beyond words, to ask questions instead of assuming, and to attune with another so they feel recognized and validated. Developing your skills in this area takes consistent practice, and it is well worth your time and effort. For more on this, see my article “How to Raise Your Influence in Less Than 5 Seconds.”

5. Decide to confront conflict courageously. There is perhaps nothing more damaging to our ability to relate than to allow unresolved conflict to fester. To feel a rupture in a relationship without repair is to foster stress, negative feelings, lost opportunities, and poor modeling for others. The cost of inaction – of allowing the rupture to fester – touches many, affecting the quality of your leadership and the lives of those around you. Want to fall in love with conflict so that you improve the quality of your relationships on a systematic basis? Read here.

I invite you to begin sharpening your emotional intelligence today so that you enjoy more influence, better decision-making, more productive and fulfilling relationships, and a healthier leadership future. How might having higher relational skills benefit you, your team, and your organization?

Next week, we will explore the second of three shifts you need to make: Vertical Development 2.0.

HOW MUCH

DO OTHERS REALLY TRUST YOU?

​Learn the two vital parts to trust and how they can help you become a more highly effective leader.

GET THE INFOGRAPHIC


© Patti Cotton and patticotton.com. All rights reserved. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express written permission from the author is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that attribution is made to Patti Cotton and patticotton.com, with links thereto.

Patti Cotton

Patti Cotton reenergizes talented leaders and their teams to achieve fulfillment and extraordinary results. For more information on how Patti Cotton can help you and your organization, click here.

Why Humble Leadership is Underrated

September 12, 2018 By Patti Cotton Leave a Comment

Why Humble Leadership is Underrated
Image Credit: Shutterstock

When people hear the words “humility” and “leadership” in the same sentence, it’s often hard for them to grapple.   

But this leadership trait is misunderstood – and underrated.

If you’ve been thinking that you need more charisma and a touch more swagger in order to instill confidence and trust in your followers, think again. 

Possessing humility is often perceived as weak and unsure, or lacking confidence. And certainly, if you appear to be a pushover, you will soon be disregarded and dismissed.  

However, humility does not mean you are a doormat. Instead, it means to keep your gifts and talents in perspective, recognizing those of others as equally valuable. A humble leader is outwardly focused and oriented toward others, keeping their welfare in mind. 

Sadly, we have long been drawn to the “celebrity effect” of those who exhibit great charm and big personality. Throughout history, we have migrated toward those with an extra dose of narcissism, equating this with know-how, expertise, and the confidence to see things through.  

Indeed, a certain “swagger” can be productive. Changemakers such as Napoléon Bonaparte, John D. Rockefeller, and Steve Jobs have made great impact. Jack Welch and George Soros, whether you agree with their approach or not, are gifted strategists who are creating legacy through seeing the big picture and taking the risks necessary to make change. 

Yet, such narcissism has its dark side, as well, including the leader being highly distrustful and emotionally isolated. Narcissistic leaders can begin to believe they are larger than life and develop Hubris Syndrome, which can stunt and cripple an organization’s effectiveness. Such leaders focus strongly on their own value and ideas and eclipse the value and contributions of others. Their self-management can decrease to the point where sudden outbursts and raging are considered acceptable to them – as long as it is they who are doing the raging. Such a lack of relational skills can be extremely damaging to others and to the enterprise. 

Conversely, the humble leader learns from criticism and admits mistakes. He empowers followers to learn and develop and listens to the perspectives of others to broaden possibilities. He holds employees responsible for results and takes his own personal risks for the greater good. 

As we connect these dots, we can see how followers would be inspired to commit to a humble leader. Such an approach would create a positive and supportive culture. And within the organizational structure, when this is present, the employee body responds favorably as a whole, with greater commitment, engagement, productivity, creativity and innovation…all the things that a business needs to head successfully into the future. 

Indeed, the benefits of humility on a large scale is exposed through Jim Collins’ research. In his book Good to Great, the author studied nearly 1,500 companies over 30 years. The companies he selected were considered of average or near average performance just prior to a transition. However, after the transition point, they outperformed the market by nearly three times over the 15 years that followed.  

Collins asked why.  

What was the difference in those that made this amazing shift – and those that did not? His researchers found two distinct characteristics among the leaders of these companies: humility and a steely determination to do the right thing for the company, no matter how painful. 

What is your humility quotient? Ask yourself the following questions:

  1. Do I recognize the value of others’ contributions? 
  2. Do I invite people to voice their ideas and challenges? 
  3. Do I seek feedback regularly and act on it? 
  4. Do I listen to various perspectives with the mindset of learning something new? 
  5. Do I admit my mistakes when I discover my behaviors or actions are faulty?  
  6. Do I change direction when I find I am leading down the wrong path? 
  7. Do I work for the good of the organization and not for myself? 

Begin to refocus on the examples of great leaders such as Benjamin Franklin and Mahatma Gandhi. What about them can you emulate more? 

Learn from great leaders such as George Washington, who admitted imperfection, but changed course. At a certain point in his career, Washington realized that his ambition outperformed his virtue. When he made the shift to a more humble leadership approach by serving others and the cause of justice, he changed the course of history. 


HOW MUCH

DO OTHERS REALLY TRUST YOU?

​Learn the two vital parts to trust and how they can help you become a more highly effective leader.

GET THE INFOGRAPHIC

Patti Cotton

Patti Cotton reenergizes talented leaders and their teams to achieve fulfillment and extraordinary results. For more information on how Patti Cotton can help you and your organization, click here.

What Do We All Really Want in Life?

April 12, 2017 By Patti Cotton Leave a Comment

January 15, 2009. It began like many other days in his lifetime – checking in at the airport, taking his seat in the captain’s chair, and running through the pre-flight checklist. He had done it thousands of times in his expansive career. As he took off, he remarked to his co-pilot, “What a beautiful view of the Hudson today!”

Little did he know that, within seconds of making that remark, he was about to make a detour into his ultimate purpose in life. That was the day Captain Chesley B. “Sully” Sullenberger safely landed US Airways Flight 1549 in the Hudson River, saving the lives of all on board.

When you are young, your goals are related to learning, experiencing, and advancing in your career. These are the building years – building family, building a career or business, and building community.

But there’s a shift that occurs in mid-life, where you begin to look at life from a broader perspective. You shift from simply wanting to make a living to being compelled to make a difference. Captain Sully writes about this in his book, Making a Difference, where he shares the insights of leaders in business, technology, science, and other industries.

As an executive coach, I meet talented and experienced business men and women every day who express to me a desire to make a difference, to know their lives have made an impact – on their relationships, their community, their business, and in some big or small way, the world. They may have earned the income and positional respect, but it is impact that matters most to them.

It made me realize that I, too, had this perspective. As a busy wife, mother, grandmother, and now care-taker daughter, I want make an impact on my family. As a volunteer with women and children’s organizations, I desire to make an impact on my community. As a business owner, I am compelled to make an impact in the business world. And as a former diplomat, I desired to make an impact even then.

What is the impact?

It differs for each person, but for me, it is about developing leaders for this generation and the next – leaders who, themselves, will make a difference, each in their own way. It is about developing good ethics and values in my grandchildren so they can have a blessed life. It is about developing strong communities by strengthening its people. It is about developing strong and successful business leaders to make an impact, not only in their lives, but in the lives of their people. It is about developing relationships with others, which makes for a better world.

What is impact for you?

What difference would you like to make in these four key areas of your life?

  • Relationships
  • Community
  • Business
  • World

This is a challenging but compelling question. Taking the time to reflect and explore each area allows you to set goals for the second act of your life that will fulfill your desire to truly make a difference.

You have spent decades preparing for this day. The question is, where do you go from here and how do you make a difference?


Patti Cotton helps executives optimize their effectiveness in leading self, others, and the enterprise. Her areas of focus include confidence, leadership style, executive presence, effective communication, succession planning, and masterful execution. With over 25 years of leadership experience, both stateside and abroad, Patti works with individuals, teams, and organizations across industries, providing executive coaching, leadership development, succession planning, change, and conflict management. She is also a Fortune 500 speaker. For more information on how Patti Cotton can help you and your organization, click here.

Patti Cotton

Patti Cotton reenergizes talented leaders and their teams to achieve fulfillment and extraordinary results. For more information on how Patti Cotton can help you and your organization, click here.

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